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Clogged Pipe

May 15, 2018

It all started when I noticed the shower wasn’t draining, so after pouring Drano, taking apart 2 sinks and trying the plunger to no avail, my husband Russ took the cap off of a huge catch pipe in the basement which revealed this black sludge blocking the whole thing. Well, as soon as he removed the sludge that was clogging the pipe, it was like someone removed the Hoover Dam wall; it unleashed this unholy, raging blackish river flowing at a super high pressure, which he was fortunately catching quite neatly in a huge bucket...until he yelled for me to screw the cover back on the pipe because the bucket was quickly filling to capacity. You know when you put your thumb over the nozzle of a garden hose on high and it sprays everywhere? That was pretty much re-enacted inside my house on a much larger scale. The pipe is around 6 inches in diameter with roaring slop water blasting out of it, and I’m pushing the cap on as hard as I can…but I can NOT get it to screw on.  So while the unbridled “water” shooting out from the sides of the loose cap is drenching my sweatshirt and legs while lightly spritzing my face, Russ is getting a full-on fury of high pressured unsanitary mucky water directly at his face! I know this because I can hear him gasping for breath while he’s holding the bucket as I’m screaming, “It won’t go on!!” In the back of my mind I’m thinking I told him we should have called a plumber, or a priest for an exorcism! I’m also thinking oh Mylanta, we’re like one of those couples they feature on the DIY Home Improvement Network for what not to do! He finally grabbed the cap, I grabbed the bucket, and he got the stupid cap on. He yelled, “It’s in my mouth!!” along with some other colorful words I can’t repeat. I’m laughing at how soaked to the bone we are as he assured me, “Don’t worry, it’s mostly water.” I said, while looking at a chunk of something unspeakable on my sweatshirt, “Well it sure doesn’t look or smell like water!” He had his dress clothes on from work, too, so he left his destroyed dress shirt downstairs in defeat next to the washing machine in the basement. It was like a horror show in our basement for a good 20-foot radius. Our teenaged daughter was upstairs, blissfully unaware of the mayhem she missed out on, probably pretending she couldn’t hear the ensuing pandemonium downstairs. We came upstairs from the basement dripping wet, one of us missing a shirt, both with wet hair matted down, looking like we just lost in a super soaker battle using mystery waste water, and Lauren just stared at us in disbelief and said, “Ummmmmm…..what happened?” Russ said nonchalantly like it was an everyday occurrence, “Don’t go downstairs for a bit.” So my public service announcement is please don’t remove the blockage right after you’ve used the plunger because it creates a pressure in the lines the likes of which you don’t ever want to see, taste or wear!!

sure doesn’t look or smell like water!” He had his dress clothes on from work, too. It was like a horror show in our basement for a good 10 foot radius. So my public service announcement is don’t remove the blockage right after you’ve used the plunger because it creates a pressure in the lines you don’t ever want to see!!sure doesn’t look or smell like water!” He had his dress clothes on from work, too. It was like a horror show in our basement for a good 10 foot radius. So my public service announcement is don’t remove the blockage right after you’ve used the plunger because it creates a pressure in the lines you don’t ever want to see!! but Russ is getting a full on fury directly at his face! I know this because I can hear him gasping for breath while he’s holding the bucket and I’m screaming it won’t go on!! In the back of my mind I’m like I told him we should have called a plumber, or a priest for an exorcism! I’m also thinking oh my God, we’re like one of those couples they feature on the diy home improvement network for what not to do! He finally grabs the cap and I grab the bucket and he gets the stupid cap on. I’m laughing at how soaked to the bone we are and he says don’t worry, it’s mostly water. I said while looking at a chunk of something on my sweatshirt, “Well ithuge bucket...until he yells for me to screw the cover back on the pipe. You know how you put your thumb over the nozzle of a garden hose on high and it sprays everywhere? Well this pipe is like 6 inches in diameter with roaring sludge water, and I’m pushing the cap on as hard as I can, but I can NOT get it to screw on so it’s drenching my sweatshirt and legs while lightly spritzing my face,

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