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6 Million Dollar Man

September 30, 2019

Do you remember the 6 Million Dollar Man TV series where they took an astronaut who was in an accident, and replaced some of his injured limbs with bionics? That was back almost 50 years ago, and they had said right in the tag line, “We can rebuild him, we have the technology.” Well if we had the technology back then to rebuild body parts into something “better, stronger, faster” like Lee Majors had, why can’t we do that now? Doctors can’t even make people better most of the time, let alone stronger and faster. We put a man on the moon 50 years ago and healthcare is more expensive now than ever, but you’re telling me we don’t have the technology to make people run around at the superhuman strength and speed while using their bionic eyes to spot tiny objects miles away like Steve Austin could? We can’t even replace hips properly most of the time, and they’re usually not stronger and faster! People can barely walk after paying 6 million dollars to replace their hips. I thought they said we had the technology? Can you imagine if bionics did work? Grandma would be running around the house after her hip and shoulder replacement surgeries, baking up a storm! It’s a win for everyone! Her whole life has been in service to others, she deserves this. Laser eye surgery can barely help you see 20/20, and that’s only if the planets perfectly align and you qualify as a candidate. You never hear dramatic background music like they played during the show when he was trying to use his eagle eye to spot something half way across the planet. I’ve probably invested 6 million dollars into my family eyecare plan and glasses over the years, and not one of us can read a road sign in the distance until we’re practically on top of it. I feel jipped. So not only was Lee’s character Steve Austin so cool as a former astronaut who’s now bionic, but they built him a bionic girlfriend, Lindsey Wagner, so that they could run off super-fast into the sunset together. What guy doesn’t want to tell his friends that their girlfriend’s bionic? Fist bump from every guy on the planet. Although she did have supersonic hearing powers, he probably didn’t like that as much. She probably didn’t care for it either in a noisy restaurant, that probably drove her nuts! I just remember her super power she mainly used was jumping really high. Bad guys show up and there goes Lindsey, jumping out of harm’s way like her legs were made out of pogo sticks. Regardless, can you imagine how much you could get done around the house in a weekend if you and your spouse were bionic? Break out that to do list honey, it just got real. We’re checking it all off TO-DAY! Here’s to hoping they really do come up with the technology so you can jump around and get stuff done!

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