Dealing with the Automated Answering Service
I hate automated answering services when you call up a business. The last one I called I heard the computer generated, very calm female voice say, “State your problem after the beep” and then 2 seconds later there’s a beep....then she gets back on and says, “That is not a valid response.” I’m thinking I know it’s not a valid response because I didn’t say anything since you only gave me 2 seconds to perfectly summarize my rather complex problem I’m calling about, just give me a second! Then I finally come up with "account access” after the beep and I’m all proud of myself, but then she replies, “Did you say pixie stix....beep?” No, I definitely did not say my problem is pixie stix, I like them actually. That’s not even close to what I said. She keeps asking me my problem and getting it wrong, and now after saying I can’t access my account several times, several different ways, it spirals out of control and the computer and I are talking over each other.
Computer: “Did you say apple Frisbee?”
Me: “What? What in the free world is an apple Frisbee? I never said that!”
Computer: “That is not a valid response”
Me: “Well now I want an apple Frisbee. That’s my new problem.”
Computer: “That is not a valid response”
Me: “Why are you assuming food is my problem anyways? What are you saying?”
Computer: “That is not a valid response”
Me: “You’re not a valid response!”
Just then an actual person got on and I’m not sure how much he heard, so I said sorry...I was having fun with your computer automated phone service. Of course as punishment I get transferred a bunch of times to all of the wrong departments. The department they transfer you to always sounds annoyed at you like it’s your fault you got sent to their que as they say, “How did you get this number, who transferred you here?” I said, “I don’t know, first I got a computer....I’m practically deaf and that automated lady was malfunctioning so that didn’t work out, then I got sent to someone and I don’t want to get them in trouble or anything but his name was Bob Rogers.” I’ll throw Bob under the bus, I don’t care at this point because Bob shouldn’t have transferred me to the wrong place lol! These people think I’m calling about pixie sticks and will send me anywhere to get rid of me. Now after talking to 6 different departments my original problem doesn’t seem so bad and I think that’s their ultimate goal in the first place! After an hour of my life I’ll never get back I just hang up and think keep your weird apple Frisbee, I don’t want access to my account after all, I just need my peace of mind back! So if you ever have trouble with automated phone systems when calling businesses, keep in mind you’re not alone.Just then an actual person got on and I’m not sure how much he heard, so I said sorry...I was having fun with your computer automated phone service. Of course as punishment I get transferred a bunch of times to all of the wrong departments. The department they transfer you to always sounds annoyed at you like it’s your fault you got sent to their que as they say, “How did you get this number, who transferred you here?” I said, “I don’t know, first I got a computer....I’m practically deaf and that automated lady was malfunctioning so that didn’t work out, then I got sent to someone and I don’t want to get them in trouble or anything but his name was Bob Rogers.” I’ll throw Bob under the bus, I don’t care at this point because Bob shouldn’t have transferred me to the wrong place lol! These people think I’m calling about pixie sticks and will send me anywhere to get rid of me. Now after talking to 6 different departments my original problem doesn’t seem so bad and I think that’s their ultimate goal in the first place! After an hour of my life I’ll never get back I just hang up and think keep your weird apple frisbie, I don’t want access to my account after all, I just need my peace of mind back! lol!