Expired Easter Dishes
Ingredients are hard to find and scary to shop for new…so some of our Easter dishes are sketchy at best since we’re forced to throw together whatever expired in the back of our pantries or has freezer burn in the bottom of our freezers. Whatever we couldn’t stomach to eat in the past and was collecting dust is now our Easter Sunday best. Lauren, God bless her, took it upon herself to clean out our pantry. She should have worn a homemade mask for that. She pulled out somethin
Dog's Bad Haircut
So we had to resort to cutting our Yorkie dog’s hair. It went south in a hurry. My daughter and I started by grabbing a big clump of hair and cut it, but by the second clump we couldn’t help but notice how horribly uneven it was coming out. So when the one side looked really bad, like a depraved shag carpet from the 70’s, we had to try to do the other side so he was at least symmetrical. But when it came to his legs, each one wound up with different length fur coverage. Each
Truckers
I am so happy truckers are finally getting some recognition. My Dad was always a big fan of Mack Trucks and taught us all how to recognize the different makes and models, so that was a game we played on road trips when we were younger. We tried to see who could guess the make of an 18-wheeler in the oncoming lane first. When “The Dukes of Hazard” was as popular in the 70’s as the Fast and Furious movies are now that glamorize fast cars, I thought BJ and Bear with the Kenworth
Quarantined Co-Workers
Sometimes you have to laugh to reduce your stress, especially when you have impressionable kids who are watching you. On my daughter’s college Facebook page, the parents are playing a game where they said now that school is online or they’re home on spring break, tell us something your kids are doing, but call them your co-workers. Here’s some of the examples of what the college parents said, as well as some compilations from my family and friends who also posted it. I threw
Toilet Paper Shortage
I’m no longer an empty nester! My daughter’s college is closed, with classes online for the rest of the semester. I appreciate her professor’s humor as he said, “Please do NOT turn your cameras on if they’re on your laptops, I don’t need to see what you look like when you roll out of bed at 8am. I, however, will be sitting in a tall leather chair with a fake fireplace in the background, wearing a cardigan with a pipe in one hand and a glass of whisky in the other for my class
Hand Washing Season
We’re in the heart of diligent hand washing season, and I for one have removed my fingerprints by now I’ve washed my hands so much. I try not to go out to dinner much, because it’s a whole thing. First, I don’t want to open the door to the restaurant, so my only other option in my panicked mind is to loiter outside like a crazy person until someone else arrives so that I can run in behind them like I belong to their dinner party. It’s not awkward or anything. Then after being
Are You Competitive?
Do you consider yourself a competitive person? When it came to sports, I was always competitive, but table/board games or card games, strangely not so much. You’d think a person would be all in or not at all, regardless of the game. In early elementary school at third and fourth grade especially, I was the most competitive because not only did I expect 100 percent performance for myself at all important recess, but it felt like my existence depended on the ability of my class
Allergic Reaction
Did you ever hear someone say children, spouses or friends of medical personnel have to be in serious condition before they get any medical care from them, and they’re often just told “you’re fine” instead? For me, one day back in the early 90’s, I went with my sister Mary Jo, her friend, our husbands and kids to Sesame Place Water Park on a super-hot sunny summer day. As soon as we got into the carpool car on the way to the park, I noticed that I had broken out in about 10,0